lunes, 16 de noviembre de 2009

MI HERMANA , YO Y ONCE AÑOS DE DIFERENCIA

Los primeros recuerdos de mi niñez eran solitarios, no tenia hermanito/a, jugaba sola, tenia amigos imaginarios y cada tanto le solicitaba a mi madre un hermanito para poder jugar, el aburrimiento era inminente y hablar sola traería trastornos posteriores, evidentemente lo intuía .
Después de arduas negociaciones y una carta documento enviada a la cigüeña, once años mas tarde, mi madre anuncia la buena nueva, había ganado la licitación de un hermano.
A esa altura no me interesaba mucho si era varón, nena, andrógeno, la cosa era tener un hermano y sentir en carne propia la compañía de otro integrante en la familia, los rebuscados dirán porque no le compraron un perro a esa chica, la verdad no se porque misterio los perros no sobrevivían mas de dos meses, pero ese es tema de otro blog, la cosa era que solicitaba un acompañante humano real en la familia.
Un 15 de noviembre mama rompe bolsa, mi madre era de esas mujeres inquietas que si la veías sentada era porque algo le pasaba , ese día se levanto con su panza de nueve meses , hizo los quehaceres, salio del baño y dijo con voz calma “rompí bolsa”
La sobredosis de documentales de partos extremos de esa época y mi antipatía a la injusta forma de traer gente al mundo me horrorizaron y me pusieron muy nerviosa a mis once años, al punto de cronometrarle a mi padre cada movimiento,
Mi madre estaba por parir, se supone que debía estar nervioso corriendo y haciendo torpezas como en las películas, muy por el contrario con la panchez que lo caracteriza cuyo beneficio actual es el robo de una década en apariencia, mi padre actuaba como si fuera a acompañarla al dentista a arreglarse una muela.
A las tres de la mañana del 16 de noviembre me entere que era una nena, una hermanita, por fin mis pedidos se habrían hecho realidad y con un valor agregado importante: era una niña.
Cuando la conocí dormía pequeñita en la cunita plástica del hospital, la sorpresa fue al otro día, llegue de la escuela y ella estaba envuelta en sabanas bordadas de un moises rosa, creo que la observe con estupefacción horas y horas y horas .
A pesar e la diferencia de edad, siempre fue mi compañera, paso muchas etapas en mi vida, fue la muñeca a quien peinaba y sacaba a pasear a todas partes, fue mi intento de practica docente, mi practica de futura madre, mi practica de arbitraje y amigable componedora en su adolescencia con mis padres , mi amiga y amiga de mis amigas.
Hoy con sus 23 años de edad y más altura que yo, sigue siendo la enana, mi enana.
Dicen que los hermanos son distintos y es verdad, a los mayores nos hacen mas neuróticos y más culposos en todo, los más chicos los agarran entrenados y los padres entienden y distinguen con más acierto lo terrible de lo simple y normal, creando mas o menos inseguridades dependiendo el orden.
La ecuación diferencial entre mi hermana y yo es simple, radica en que cuando a una le falta cojones , de seguro la otra los tiene, pareciera que el balance natural de la vida dio como resultado esto.
Cuando supe que volaría par hacer su vida como todo pájaro que debe abandonar el nido me asuste mucho, actúe como madre desconsolada llorando sola en mi cuarto mirando fotos viejas, después con aires de superacion, tranquilice a mi padre le dije que va a estar todo bien, que ella sabe lo que hace, respire profundo guarde mi neurastenia para cuando se marchen mis futuros hijos y la despedí.
Hoy estamos a 1500 Km. de distancia, a dos horas en avión, a 24 en micro y a segundos de un teléfono y a un todos los días por msn.
Verla resuelta me hace sentir feliz y orgullosa, en los recuerdos mas lindos se atesoran nuestros momentos, las charlas en el sillón, la flaca de los domingos, la cocina experimental, las risotadas, los días de compras, el te con nuestras amigas, solo espero que si la vida me da hijas mujeres puedan disfrutar tanto como yo a mi hermana a pesar de los once años de diferencia.

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